Nothing Except...

So, I’ve been without words for some time.
This, the wordlessness, it is a good thing.
For too long I have had many words, but my heart only knew the half of their meaning.
And still, now, I only know the half.
(If that.)
I think back to {Hope Discovered} and {Trust Discovered} and I want to go back in time and tell myself that I would learn so much more, that those moments were just the start of many discoveries.
I would want to tell myself that the only hope that lasts is the hope of my life in Christ. 
Hope is good, but hope in anything-even good things like healing- other than Christ will some day fade. 
I would want to tell myself that “my life in Christ” is something God would lead me to and through and in -breath by breath-and often with circumstances that I don’t understand.
I would want to re title {Trust Discovered} to {Teaching me to Trust More} because that is what He has been doing every day since that post.
I would want to show myself Job 42:1-3:
“Then Job answered the Lord and said:
“I know that you can do all things,
and that no purpose of yours can be thwarted…
Therefore I have uttered what I did not understand,
Things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.”
And Psalm 139:6:
“Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it”
And so, trying to find words to post here today, it is even harder because I see how much I really just don't know.
My days have been so full of change and uncertainty and trials.
More than ever.
I have actually caught myself looking back to the days that I thought were hard, and thinking I would love to go back to those days sometimes.
And, also- in stark contrast- my days, they have been filled to overflowing with love and blessings and peace that defies understanding.
In seeing how much I just don't know, God is able to show me more of Himself, of His love, of His heart.
These are the moments that I wouldn't want to go back to past days no matter what.
But I am not ready to write about those things yet.
So, for awhile, I will be posting pictures and updating pages.
I will be designing and revamping my blog.
I will be praying for words to come that are “precious and not worthless” (Jeremiah 15:19)
I will be praying about where God wants me to write, how and when and even if.
Because I have learned that it was my choice to say “yes” to God, but after that, He gets to choose the how.
And although I have always loved words and putting them together, God may have different plans for me.
So until I know His plan for this blog and until words worthy of the work He is doing are found this is my focus:

“For I decided to know nothing among you except Jesus Christ and him crucified.”

1 Corinthians 2:2

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